| Monday, February 4, 2008 |
| The End |
Like most people, I've never been very good at keeping New Years Resolutions. But I usually make it longer than a month. Unfortunately, that's not going to be the case this year.
I'm officially halting the Make Doug Fat project.
I have spent the last few days trying to figure out what to do. There are a myriad of reasons why I am stopping, not the least of which is the possibility (small, yes, but still existent) that this could negatively affect a job I very much enjoy.
The biggest reason though, is that I like Doug. Sure, sometimes he asks me so many questions I want to pull my hair out. But he's a nice guy. And I think he likes his job too. Make Doug Fat has grown larger than I ever expected (pun totally intended) in a very short period of time. And more people in our company know about it than I can count. I know that if I found out someone was trying to make me fat while writing about it and most of my coworkers knew about it, I might not like my job any more.
The point is, this was never meant to be a project that legitimately mocked Doug. It was in good fun. I'd like to stop while it's still fun and before anyone gets their feelings seriously hurt.
So, thanks for stopping by, have a great 2008, and keep on eating. |
| posted by Crisco McFatty @ 11:18 PM |
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| Friday, February 1, 2008 |
| Sweet Tarts |
Today, I put some Sweet Tarts in Doug's top desk drawer. I decided leaving sweet things on his desk two days in a row might be a little much. But, if he opens his desk drawer to find candy, he might just think he put it there.
If you think that's unreasonable, you don't know Doug. He always has some sort of snack in his desk drawer. Anytime he finds candy and doesn't want to eat it right away (which is rare, but does happen) he puts it in the drawer for later.
So, now he's got some extra snacks. And Sweet Tarts can be somewhat addictive. So, my guess is if he opens up one package, the other 5 or 6 will be eaten in immediate succession.
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Also, on a side note, I'm really fighting some guilt on this project. So, I'd like for it to be on the record that Doug really is a good guy. And I'm not doing this with any seriously malicious intent. I don't want him to have a heart attack, get diabetes, or anything of that magnitude. I also don't want him to think he is being mocked or ostracized. He's a growing boy. And growing boys need their nutrients. And I hear that sometimes nutrients come in the form of extra sticks of butter and sugar comas. It's not my fault if the public school system didn't teach me any decent nutritional information. Right? |
| posted by Crisco McFatty @ 9:56 AM |
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| In 2008, I have resolved to make Doug fat. Does he know who I am? I hope not. Will he still eat all of the food left for him? Probably. Will he pack on the pounds? Read and find out. |
| About Me |
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Name: Crisco McFatty
Home: United States
About Me: I'm not a good person.
See my complete profile
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